Dear Abby: My husband has a male co-worker, ďBo,Ē who comes to our house occasionally. We have two bathrooms, one of which is in our bedroom. The other is the guest bathroom.
When Bo needs to use the restroom, he goes into our bedroom and uses ours. He never asks; he just goes in, even after I have pointed out the guest bathroom. It creeps me out. I feel like heís invading my personal space, and I think itís rude.
Bo is intimidating. He thinks he can do whatever he wants. Please tell me what I can do.
Creeped Out in Greenville
Dear Creeped Out: I agree your husbandís co-workerís behavior is creepy. If you have medications in your bathroom, you should check to be sure he isnít helping himself to some of them when he visits.
Because you canít seem to convey the message to ďBo the Boor,Ē before his next visit, ask your husband to tell him that guests are supposed to use the guest bathroom. And if that doesnít discourage him, install a lock on your bedroom door.
Dear Abby: My 21-year-old daughter, ďAlex,Ē and her 6-year-old moved into an apartment with her 18-year-old boyfriend. We had a tough time accepting this, but I make do because I love Alex and want to be part of her life.
My boyfriend of eight years, ďNiles,Ē canít accept my daughterís new boyfriend. We were invited over for dinner and Niles refused to go.
How do I handle this?
Sad Mother in New Jersey
Dear Sad Mother: Tell Niles that if you must choose between him and your daughter, you will choose your daughter. Her roma≠nce may ó or may not ó last for≠ever, but your relationship with her will. There is nothing to be ga≠ined by punishing her and alien≠ating her young man. If Niles has a problem with that, donít let him make it your problem, too. Continue your relationship with your daughter and see Niles separately.
Dear Abby: Today is my 50th birthday. I have a few close friends, but Iím not widely social.
The members of my book club knew it was my birthday when we met a few days ago. I had mentioned it before our meeting. Nothing was said when we met.
My best friend is going on vacation and hasnít remembered. My husband asked me what plans I had made for us to do today. My sister, bless her, has been wonderful and feels responsible to try to make this day special for me.
Is it really my job to plan a celebration and remind everyone Iím close to? Iím hurt that no one feels Iím worth the effort. Am I making too big a deal out of this?
Vexed In Vermont
Dear Vexed: I think so. My dear mother used to say, ďIf you want something done right, do it yourself!Ē Thatís good advice when those around you are too preoccupied to be as nurturing as you would like them to be.
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