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Dear Abby: I’ve been with my fiance for three years and I’m in love. A few months ago I asked to use his phone to look up something on the Internet because my battery had died. It opened up to a gay porn site! I was shocked and asked him if it was something he was looking at. He admitted that it was.

Nothing like this has happened to me before, so I began asking if that’s what he likes and is into. He assured me the answer was no. He said he looked because he was curious about it. He told me he loves women and doesn’t want to be with men.

Is this normal behavior?

Weirded Out in The West

Dear Weirded Out: I took your question to an expert on adult entertainment viewing, Larry Flynt. He said that while CURIOSITY is normal, not many heterosexual men make a habit of viewing gay male porn sites. He added that if your fiance is a regular consumer of this kind of entertainment, he may have latent homosexual tendencies.

I then consulted Jack Drescher, M.D., a psychoanalyst and expert on gender and sexuality, who told me that some people fantasize about people of the same sex, but never ACT on it. According to Dr. Drescher, what is important is that you and your fiance are able to talk about sex honestly and openly. If you need more assurances, continue this discussion so that you both will know what you’re getting if your betrothal leads to marriage.

Dear Abby: I recently moved in with my boyfriend, “Teddy.” We are both in our 20s. Five years ago, he married his high school sweetheart. Two years later, she cheated on him and left. Teddy and I have talked about the situation countless times. I know he doesn’t love her anymore and cares for me a lot.

Abby, I lose sleep over their relationship. I can’t stop thinking about how she left him — not the other way around — and if he hadn’t caught her cheating they would still be together. I Google her to see if I can find out anything about them. I check her social media sites multiple times a day. I know I’m being ridiculous, but I’m obsessed with her!

Teddy is a caring man, he tells me everything I want to know, but my obsession is starting to get to him. I don’t want to lose him, but at the same time I wonder if I will have to leave because I can’t get over their marriage. What should I do?

Obsessed in Ohio

Dear Obsessed: There’s an old saying that applies: One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Your boyfriend’s ex didn’t recognize thea prize she had, fouled the nest and threw him away. You’re lucky she did.

I can understand your being curious about her; what I can’t understand is your compulsion to stalk her online. What she’s doing has no effect on you or your relationship with Teddy. If you keep this up, you will drive him away. If you can’t stop, find a licensed mental health professional who can give you the tools to overcome your insecurity. It’ll be money well spent.

Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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