Abby: Pregnant teen needs support, not rejection
Dear Abby: My best friend from school is pregnant. Her baby’s father is practically nonexistent, and she has no other friends besides me and one other person. I am the only one, so far, who knows about her pregnancy. She hasn’t told her dad and her grandparents because she’s scared they’ll kick her out. She has nowhere to go. My parents have told me to cut her off. What should I do?
Unsure in Texas
Dear Unsure: Because your friend is afraid to tell her family, she should talk to a counselor at school. The family will have to know soon because her pregnancy will become obvious, and she will need prenatal care.
I don’t agree with your parents that you should “cut her off.” She needs friends right now — and you can learn much from watching this from the sidelines. Stress to her how important it is that she graduates from high school, because if she keeps her baby, she will need to be able to support it. Your state department of social services should also be contacted for guidance.
Dear Abby: I am engaged to a man, “Keith,” who has numerous female “friends.” I suspect they are something more. During my second pregnancy, one of his “friends” followed me, but would never say a word to me.
When I tell Keith I am uncomfortable with these women, he says I have “no right to dictate his personal life.”
I want to know if I’m wrong for not wanting to have to deal with these “friends.”
Adrift in Los Angeles
Dear Adrift: Listen to your gut. If one of Keith’s “friends” was stalking you, your feelings about her are probably accurate.
You have already had at least one child with your fiance. Recognize that Keith won’t change much if you manage to drag him to the altar. If he is telling you now that your feelings don’t matter (“you have no right to dictate his personal life”), I hope you realize this is how his attitude will be forever.
Personally, I wouldn’t wish a life with someone this self-absorbed on anyone. But if more of the same is what you are prepared to settle for, then all anyone can do is wish you luck.
Dear Abby: Two friends decide to take a trip to Miami. One lives in New York and the other in North Carolina. They agree to use the New Yorker’s car and split the cost of the gas.
The New Yorker says the amount to be split is the cost of the fuel from New York to Miami and back to New York. The North Carolinian says the cost to be split should be from North Carolina to Miami and back to North Carolina. Which is fair?
Dear Road Weary: Really? If you two can’t agree on your own, I have a suggestion for you: Cancel the trip. If you do, it may save the friendship.
Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.