Abby: Graciousness is key to accepting a compliment

Dear Abby
Jeanne Phillips

Dear Abby: I’m a young man in my mid-20s, and I have a deeper voice than my stature would typically suggest. Close friends even get thrown off when I talk to them if they haven’t seen me in a while. I’m fairly happy with it, and people often ask if I do radio or voice acting. I run into problems, though, when strangers comment on it.

If someone says, “Wow, has anyone ever told you that you have a great voice?” or something of that nature, my first impulse is to make a joke about it. If I’m not quick enough on my feet, however, I often catch myself saying something like, “Yeah, I get that a lot,” or, “I know,” both of which sound egotistical, and I feel embarrassed afterward. Is there a way to acknowledge the compliment that doesn’t come off so pretentious?

Not Quick On My Feet

Dear Not Quick: Yes, accept the compliment graciously by saying, “Thank you.”

Dear Abby: My husband has been sick and unable to work for several years due to a debilitating illness. He has been home taking care of the kids while I have been working full time. We have lost everything because of the financial burden of his illness. I am very grateful to my parents for helping us financially during this tough time.

Unfortunately, I believe some of my family think my husband is faking his illness. This is hurtful since they have known him for a long time (we’ve been married 12 years). My sister recently asked him in a rather nasty way why he doesn’t just go get a job, and I’m beginning to think that my parents share her sentiment.

He already feels guilty and worthless for not being able to provide for our family. It’s coming to the point where I just want to get away from them and cut off contact. Should I address the issue or just let it go?

Sick In The South

Dear Sick: Address the issue. What your sister did was cruel and out of line. Ask your parents if those are their sentiments, because you are concerned they might be.

If they are having doubts about your husband’s physical problems, offer to share medical information that proves his health problems are all too real. Because your parents have been helping out financially, it might help to clear the air.

Dear Abby: We have a co-worker who has been internet dating. She constantly tells her co-workers how horrible the men are and says the same thing about the dates.

How do we tell her that it’s not the men, but her?

Stumped in Santa

Monica, Calif.

Dear Stumped: If you’re smart, you won’t — unless she asks.

Contact Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.