Abby: Homecoming rules put teen in awkward position

Dear Abby
Jeanne Phillips

Dear Abby: Homecoming is next month, and we are not allowed to take outside dates. My girlfriend goes to a different school and doesn’t want me taking anyone else. My school is very small (only 60 kids in the whole high school) and not asking a girl to the dance is frowned upon. It’s the custom to ask one of your classmates to homecoming.

I’d like to ask someone — as friends only — to the homecoming dance, but my girlfriend gets incredibly upset when I talk about it. Please tell me what to do.

Only A Dance in Texas

Dear Only A Dance: Your girlfriend needs to be less controlling and more understanding. You have already explained that not taking someone to the homecoming dance is frowned upon in your community. Your girlfriend can’t attend, so why not be a good sport and let you make someone happy for one night? What you should do is go to the dance and, if your girlfriend still doesn’t understand, ask your mother to explain it to her “woman to woman.”

Dear Abby: I live in a duplex, and my neighbor has a cat I’ll call “Sox” that’s positive for feline immunodeficiency virus. I’m a cat lover with a kitty of my own.

To prevent the spread of infection, FIV cats are never supposed to be allowed outside, but my neighbor lets Sox come and go as he pleases. Abby, he comes to our house and uses our cat door to access our cat food and water bowl. I have to get my cat tested for FIV during his annual exams, at an added cost of $60.

My question: Would it be fair of me to request that my neighbor pay for some or all of the extra expenses associated with treatment and testing due to the FIV exposure?

Feline Care

Dear Feline: Under the circumstances, I don’t think it’s unfair to ask your irresponsible neighbor to cooperate with you on this. However, don’t hold your breath.

The solution to your problem is to make Sox’s access to your home impossible by securing the cat door. And if her cat is mingling with and possibly infecting other cats in the neighborhood, call Animal Control and report it.

Contact Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.